Bernard Hiller, an actor, acting coach, author, and life trainer, was born in Argentina, raised in Germany, and began his career in New York. His career has spanned from Broadway musicals to film and television and he has worked with some of the biggest actors in the business, including George Clooney, Anne Hathaway, and Michelle Pfeiffer. As an acting coach, the list of A-list stars he has worked with would fill a phone book. However, it is as a life coach that Hiller has won great acclaim, working with everyone from artists to actors to business people. His first book, Stop Acting – Start Living, has been translated into multiple languages. His most recent book, The Revolutionary Guide to Acting: A Transformational Journey to Achieving Success in Show Business and Life, was published in August 2022. This Saturday, Feb. 11, he will speak at a luncheon at Mitch’s on El Paseo at 11:30 a.m. to the Palm Springs Women in Film and Television. 

Desert Magazine:

You were a Broadway actor. You were in musicals and touring companies. Where did the impetus to teach the craft come from?

Hiller:

I didn't really think about teaching the craft. Someone asked me to help them. And when I helped them, they got a job because I thought acting should be different. And that one actor that I helped booked the job and he brought me another person. So, all of a sudden, I became a teacher, not because I thought I would be, but because they wanted to hear what I had to say. And I've been fortunate to now teach in 26 different countries and I've developed sort of a new way to [to teach people to] become a great human being, a great businessperson, a great artist … [It] gives me the most joy – changing people's lives.

Desert:

When you look back at that first experience with that actor, can you kind of pinpoint what advice you may have given him or her that was different than, say, what Stella Adler would tell one of her students?

Hiller:

Of course, I don't want to say anything against the great Stella Adler – she's my inspiration – but acting keeps changing. The audience requires more truth than ever before. Reality television is a direct result of the audience not getting enough truth. What they want is, they want real. What I told him is that I want you to be authentic. I never did that before. There was a time where we used to play someone but we weren't that character. It takes a lot of skill because you have to find that part in yourself.

Desert:

How do you guide your students to define that place in themselves? I know that's a loaded question.

Hiller:

Let's go back. The problem in life is too many people are acting all the time, behaving how they need to behave. And it goes back to the most basic question, which is, as a child, what did you have to do to be loved? Did you have to be a good boy, a good girl, to succeed? We had to act a certain way to get attention and love because we need attention and love. What happens for most people is they don't understand that was just an act, that really wasn't who they were. And what I help them find is who they authentically are. And you'll know you're authentic if you're four things. One, you feel connected to your power. Two, you're happy because you're happy to be whoever you are, whatever you are. Third, you have no problem expressing your emotions. And fourth, you're willing to be vulnerable.

By the way, because we don't see that many authentic people, we love to watch that. If you think of any actor or performer you like, there's an authenticity about them. Al Pacino, Robert De Niro, Meryl Streep, and some other ones, of course, are willing to show that. So, the first step is a journey inward. Remember, when people come to see me, they would like to become an actor. And what I would say is, “Whatever got you here won't get you there.” Which means if you want to achieve what you've never achieved, you have to become the person you've never been. And that is sort of the trend. That's really what I do, even with my business people. 

Desert:

When you conduct a class in your studio and tell aspiring actors that, do you sometimes have actors who kind of just turn around and walk out because they don't want to go there?

Hiller:

By the time people come to see me, they know that's the journey because that's required in the industry. I'm training people to be actors of the future. Right now, what the audience demands is it wants to see the core of who you are. So, they already know that's what it is. Every day, what the audience wants is always more. We're in a situation where you have to give us a performance where we say, "Wow!" 

Desert:

My eight-year-old daughter is very addicted to these YouTube programs of people going out and doing all kinds of crazy adventures, usually outdoor adventures. I've got to say, to your point, they're very authentic people because they are just putting it out there and they are who they are. And I think that even as an eight-year-old, Charlie is responding to what she sees as a real person doing a real thing.

Hiller:

There's no question that your daughter responds to people that are authentic. And it frankly goes two ways. It can either be positive or people can take you negatively. I had an opportunity to speak to [Lady  Gaga] for a time. When Lady Gaga was starting, people thought she was insane. Do you know Jack Black, the actor?

Desert:

Yes.

Hiller:

Jack Black told me a story about when he went to an audition. They said to him, “Can you calm down? Can you relax?" And he said, "Well, that's what I do." And that's actually what made him successful. The idea is that when you become authentic, [you go against] one of the first things that happens in a world where you're not taught to be your authentic self, [when] you're taught to just blend in.

You have this beautiful daughter [and] the most beautiful thing about her is [that] she’s very different [from] everyone else. But slowly, [through] school, friends, family, whatever, some people just lose their authenticity and become a copy. Everybody kind of blends in. Because when you stick out, you are criticized. That's one of the ways I can tell you're going to be very successful – if you were bullied. The people were bullying you because you were different. I was bullied, too, and pretty much everyone that I know who's been very successful [was, as well]. People used to say, "Who do you think you are?" Like you're too much. And that's the same thing with Lady Gaga. First, they thought that she was too much, and now we love her.

Desert:

When you work with CEOs, do you use they the exact same principles that you teach to your acting students?

Hiller:

Everything's become show business – meaning how well you present yourself, how well you communicate. It's all part of learning. It's something that is a learned skill. No one is born being a great speaker. You can talk to three [or] more people. But, the moment you get 300 people, 3,000 people, 30,000 people, there's a certain type of skill that I have to teach them. Actually, it's finding out more about their life, finding out more about what they think, finding out about their childhood. I can't go forward until you fix the back. Some people think, "Oh my God, they're going to just not like me when I speak." One of the basic rules, which is a little revolutionary, is you have to love yourself so people can love you. Sometimes, you're the person stopping us. I say, "Talk about what you're talking about." And they're talking about the new refrigerator or whatever they're talking about. And I say, "Okay, now talk about something you love." [They say,] “Oh, my kid. God, I love my kid." I say, "Well, we need that in a refrigerator story." 

When people do commercials … I did 200 commercials; when I'm thinking of commercials, I'm not thinking about the product. I transferred it to something that has meaning to me. If you're excited, we're excited. But it's got to be real. [It has] to be real excitement. The audience knows right away if it's real or not. We love people who are passionate and excited. And what I try to do is actually try to make them passionate people, because I cannot make you a dynamic speaker if you're not a dynamic human being. There's no tricks here. It's a real thing. And the people that come to me know that's what we're going to go for.

Desert:

Still, business people must be a lot more challenging than actors. 

Hiller:

Most people are in their heads. They're very controlling; they trust no one; they're nervous. They have these thoughts in their heads. And I work on that. I have specific exercises. It's not just lectures. I'm all about transformation. There's a lot of people that go, "Hoorah! Let's do this and let's do that." And I know I could rile you up and, man, you're going to the gym. But the question is, why aren't you going already? Why aren't you taking care of yourself? And it's always about lack of love, lack of connection. I work on those things. I don't really work on shortcuts because they don't really work. We want the real thing.

Desert:

In your classes with actors, say, take me through what a typical day would be. I took some acting classes when I was in college and it was all about doing scenes and, I don't know, putting pillows on your head. What kind of exercises do you do?

Hiller:

Remember, everybody wants exercises connecting to their emotions, connecting to their feelings. Feelings are emotions what make you powerful. If you have trouble expressing some of your emotions, they're holding you back. That's some of your power. I want to you be able to express happiness, sadness, anger, fear, love. I want you to be able to express all of them. Most people are not good at expressing certain emotions. Typically, the first thing that we do before that is have a dance class. Because nothing happens until your body moves.

Everything that is powerful is in your body. We have an hour-long dance class. It's an hour of getting you in your body. There's a connection between the body and the head. And we have to make that one because your body has everything in it.

Step two is emotional exercises where [students] get to express their feelings – anger [and] different emotions. What holds you back from having a great future is your past. And the past is based on not able to express your traumas and your fears. There's 40 people doing it at the same time, all expressing themselves. And after you do that, you feel so much better.

Desert:

Let me ask you specifically, though, how do you get a group of 40 people to express extreme rage?

Hiller:

They know the exercises that are coming. They're aware that I've created some very successful actors. They want to have more power. We have a specific exercise where one person's standing [and] the other person's sitting and they have a connection and express different [ranges of] anger. "I'm angry about my life. I'm angry about myself." You just kind of do it in a stream-of-consciousness [mode]. You're not really speaking. "I'm angry about my past. I'm angry with being here." Sometimes, they take 20, 30 classes to express that. 

I would have to say that the great or successful actors understand what I'm saying immediately from the moment I say, “Hello,” because they know what I'm talking about. 

I work on the acting and the latest acting techniques. I want to teach them. It takes a while. It's like learning a language. And the third part I work on, too, is how to succeed with your craft, because I find so many talented people that are doing nothing with it.

Desert:

Why do you think that is – if you have all that talent and training, yet you can't land roles or get work – what is keeping you from being successful?

Hiller:

Well, there are great-looking men and women who can't get a date. What's up with that? You need to meet people. You have to learn how to talk. I would say that there are people who don't have a positive connection to going on auditions, meeting other people, going to see agents. It's like the ugly part for them. And I'm saying, "Listen, until you love that part, you're not going to be working."  They're going to be criticizing you. They're going to say, “You're too tall.” You got to be ready for that part. I would say that most people don't have a positive connection to the business. One of the things that I ask people is, "Do you have a positive connection to your dream?" And most people actually don't. They have a dream, but they think, "Oh my God, I'm too old. I'm not going to be good enough." They have negative thoughts about it. 

Desert:

So, acting is not acting.

Hiller:

There is no acting; it's about being. That's what people are responding to. Now, those are the real actors. Authenticity will serve you well if you're authentic, which means that you're caring, you're loving, you're sensitive. Authenticity is something kids have when they're three and four [years old], but they lose it [when they get] older.

We're going to talk about dreams and the art of communication. The art of communication is lost. People are having the worst relationships now. I'm talking about young kids; they're not having as much fun. They're not going out because everybody's texting. Nobody knows how to talk anymore. We really have a huge problem. And it's all about how you learn to communicate. It's the art of communication. How well can you communicate? How well can you say something?

It's not trying to fool someone, but actually coming from the heart. What I'm saying [is that] I totally feel [it] because it's real. It's who I am. I want to teach people that it's okay to be who they are in every way. And it's going to be very positive for them to move ahead if they want to be great speakers. What I like to do with business people is teach them how to become stars in their own life and their own relationship and their own career, because I use those techniques that help people become the most successful to do some of that and teach that. 

Desert:

When you work with business people and entrepreneurs, do you find that they are sometimes completely disconnected from their authentic self, that they've constructed a whole sort of business persona, that they're not really ... That they're in fact acting out the role of business person?

Hiller:

About 95% of the world is acting all the time. We have to use acting in life because now you're an interviewer, but then you play the part of a father. That's a different part than a husband, friend, lover, business person. Those are different roles. 

I find that business people are acting and not allowing their authenticity. I just was working with the head of the most famous museum in Italy. He said, "Well, I have to act a certain way because that's what they expect of me." I said, "Well, yes, but how about being you? They'll expect you to be you." He is very didactic. He's very [much like] what you expect. 

And I said, "It's okay. You can have your own humanity back." He's German. So, it's very difficult because Germans are taught to be a very different thing. But, he really enjoyed what I was talking about. You have to be your own authentic self because otherwise, you'll never be happy. And it takes a toll on your body.

There's a TV show called “Heal.” Here is their premise – people who are not able to express their feelings or emotions, who have traumas that were never expressed, end up with cancer. Cancer comes from people who are holding things in [and are] not able to express themselves. I believe that our emotions actually do cause our problems. So, one of the things about expressing yourself … We do that in a safe, loving environment in the class, all together, and express our sadness and anger. It's not like you do it once, but you realize that [it helps to show] your emotions.

The sad fact [is] that we are not allowing people to express their feelings and their emotions in a healthy way. That’s why there's such a health crisis with young people and they're not able to express what they feel or are not able to talk. You'd be so surprised at how many students I get who never had the opportunity to express themselves because their family, their parents, never expressed themselves.

One person a couple of years ago – his sister died, so he went home, I guess to the funeral, and the father said, "Don't cry." He told the son not to cry. Okay. But, one day, a year later, he took out the garbage and started crying and he couldn't stop because unexpressed emotions go inward. They don’t just disappear.

Emotions are what make you powerful. One of the rules that I also think about – people ask me, "Why do some people succeed and other people don't?" It is because their dream is emotional and personal. When they think about it, they start to weep. If it's not emotional, you are not going to overcome it. Otherwise, it's just logical. Do you understand? It has to be emotional.

Desert:

Do you think that applies to writers and any kind of artist?

Hiller:

It applies to anybody in the world. It has to be emotional, like you have no choice. It's emotional like your daughter is in trouble. It's that emotion. Dreams don't come true. That's number one. You have to turn them into reality. If you want to achieve what you've never achieved, you have to become the person you've never been, and that's the opposite of you – not the same, the opposite.

Desert:

You’re coming out to the desert to talk to a group called Women in Film and Television. What is the subject of your lecture?

Hiller:

I'm not going to be talking about acting. I'm going to talk about how you can use my principles to have a successful and more positive career and life. I'm going to talk about the secrets. I'm going to talk about how to overcome your blocks that you feel that actually are very positive for you. I'm going to talk about negative habits and how to overcome them. I'll actually talk about what I do to create incredible, powerful performers and use that skill [for] whoever's listening to me. How you communicate will determine what kind of dinner you're going to have; how you communicate will determine what kind of relationship you will have with your daughter, with everyone. It's all about the art of communication. And I will speak about the art. It'll be definitely transformative because I'm bringing new things that they've never heard before.

Desert:

One last question. The principles that you've developed over the years – how have they impacted your own acting career?

Hiller:

[They have] totally changed me. I teach everything I need to keep learning. One of the reasons I keep teaching is because I'm curious and I want to get better. I would have to say that I've learned more from teaching than I've taught them. I'm really curious about [people]. That's why I wanted to meet you, because I was thinking that if we have to meet, there's something I should learn from you. I feel like I should learn from the people that are coming. I'm going to learn something from them, but they're definitely going to learn something about me. I'm going to do a quick exercise with them, which is going to be very enlightening. I want to spread the word. This is going to be something different. [My] book is called The Revolutionary Guide to Acting and Life. There's a different way of reaching life, but it's going from the inside, because I don't feel that people need more information; they need transformation.