When Aristotle McDaniel was a young man, he would take his grandfather, Jim, to Denny’s in Indio for breakfast each Wednesday. The ritual was a gesture of support for his grandpa, who, along with McDaniel’s beloved grandmother, Marie, took care of McDaniel’s cousins when their daughter (his aunt) was struggling with addiction. It is a common story – grandparents stepping up, regardless of age or financial situation, to care for their grandchildren. This often unrecognized sacrifice occurs across the country during a phase of life when retirement promises some sense of ease. McDaniel recognized how hard this was on his grandparents and wanted to gift the special breakfast ritual to his grandfather.
Inspired by his grandparents' hard work, sacrifice, and endeavors to raise their grandkids, McDaniel founded a non-profit organization called Grandparents Love (GPL) in 2022. “I had been thinking about it for 15 years,” he says. McDaniel is now 59 years old, with three children and five grandchildren of his own. He has deep roots in the Coachella Valley. He lives in Moreno Valley, but the family owns properties in Indio and Palm Springs. He works out of Palm Desert as a regional manager for Direct Source Distributing (DSD), an agency that produces marketing, branding, signage, and apparel for businesses. “Douglas Lasater, the president and owner of DSD, is a huge supporter of GPL,” McDaniel says. He also drives for Uber to support GPL. He drives around Palm Springs – often, from 7 p.m. to 2 a.m. – and boasts a five-star rating.
Grandparents Love is a non-profit 501(c)(3) respite program designed to support custodial grandparents who make the ultimate sacrifice for their children and grandchildren. There is an online application process, and grandparents are nominated by friends, family, or members of the community. After grandparents are registered, they are asked to make a “wants, needs, and nice to have” list. For example, people might want a new car, but a new set of tires might be acceptable. Maybe a washing machine is needed, or a date night would be an appreciated treat.
McDaniel describes an older couple who loved seafood and were granted a dinner at Pacifica Seafood Restaurant in Palm Desert. GPL gave 25% to the server as a tip and followed up on how the evening unfolded. In this case, the server overheard the couple discussing sharing an appetizer because of the cost. When they truly realized this was an evening granted to them, they could enjoy the evening out and each other. “Now, I like lobster,” the guest shared enthusiastically. This simple dinner out – so common for many – made a huge difference for this couple and allowed them to reconnect. “That’s why I do it,” McDaniel says.
The mission of Grandparents Love is to support families through difficult transitions. There is much to tackle when grandparents suddenly find themselves raising young children: liaising with the school district; obtaining prenatal and infant education; finding real estate resources and information about insurance, paralegal aid, nutrition, and grandparents’ rights; and looking for help with myriad other challenges that might occur. Some families might be undocumented and need help with immigration status. “My main motivation is seeing how hard my grandparents worked,” McDaniel says.
Years earlier, when Jim’s family came to Indio after World War II, they managed a dry cleaning business. McDaniel reminisced about his family’s early years in the Coachella Valley: “Members of the Rat Pack would visit the business, and if ‘Mr. Mac’ (Jim) wasn’t there to personally take their clothes, they’d come back when he was available.”
The family’s Coachella Valley lore goes even deeper. “On my mother’s side, my grandmother was much more than a housekeeper,” McDaniel says. “She was trusted to maintain multiple celebrities’ homes during the summers, ensuring everything was immaculate and ready for their return. Occasionally, we’d spend holidays at Red Skelton’s home in Palm Springs, where I learned to swim. His generosity in letting us use his pool and home created unforgettable family memories.”
Jim seemed like everybody’s grandpa; he was a man with many talents. He worked at Indio High School as a campus aide from 1970 to 1981. The students loved him so much that they raised funds to buy him a golf cart so he could work comfortably.
Jim was responsible for taking care of his grandchildren after Marie died in the late 1990s. After years of shepherding high school students around campus, away from trouble, and toward education, he was now on tap for his own grandchildren in a big way. McDaniel was struck by his selflessness. “You notice the homeless folks on the street, but you don't think of the grandparents stepping up,” he lamented. “Many grandparents have a lot of pride, and certainly kids raised by family fare better than those thrust into foster care. But, there aren’t many programs or much government support for grandparents.”
Relatives shared with McDaniel how much the breakfasts at Denny’s meant to Jim after he died in 2017. They said Jim would lay out his clothes on Tuesday night in anticipation of the cherished breakfast, and his focus on his attire was poignant. The Denny’s breakfast “was Papa Jim’s respite,” McDaniel says. Sometimes, the breakfast lasted four hours. Everyone came by to greet Jim, who loved spending time with his grandson. McDaniel spoke lovingly about Jim teaching him to tie a tie and said his grandma’s smile and fluffy pancakes gave him a sense of comfort and warmth.
Grandparents Love plans on participating in the Tour de Palm Springs charity cycling event on Feb. 7 and 8, 2025. The organization will host a Taste of Soul and Comfort Resource Fair on March 17 at the Palm Desert Learning Tree Center. GPL will offer vendors, lawyers, insurance support, and food trucks. The event will feature a DJ, a silent auction, a face painter, and more. The organization hopes to offer 150 meals to local families while supporting the local food truck culture.
Board members of GPL include an accountant, a pastor, a paralegal, a property management specialist, a caterer/chef, and the economic development director for the Agua Caliente Band of Cahuilla Indians. Since its was founded, GPL has assisted five families with navigating the process of grandparents caring for their grandchildren. The need for help outpaces the organization's capacity.
McDaniel hopes to provide support and recognition to many other needy families with the spirits of Jim and Marie guiding the project, support from the community, and the GPL Board bringing a variety of resources and skills to the table. If you would like to nominate a grandparent, donate, or get involved, visit Grandparents Love.
