Whether you wear glasses, have an accent, or have a habit that’s perceived by others as a weakness, being a bully’s target can be traumatic, and the effects can be long-lasting. Dimitri Halkidis knows this all too well. His family came to the United States in 1967 from Katerini, Greece and settled in Stamford, Connecticut. As an immigrant, Halkidis felt like he did not fit in with other children. The impact of bullying stayed with him as he started a successful career as a celebrity photographer in New York City and Los Angeles. His subjects include members of the Brat Pack, Grace Jones, George Clooney, Sarah Jessica Parker, and supermodels of the 1990s.
When Halkidis’ cousin’s daughter was struggling with an eating disorder, it really affected him. He felt that the illness was a form of self-bullying. It caused him to reflect on his childhood and brought back memories of his own challenges as an immigrant. As a child, he hated his name; he realized that the body shaming, racism, and homophobia he experienced was profound.
Halkidis is the president and founder of Boo2Bullying (B2B), a 501(c)(3) organization that he started in 2011. He was moved to create this safe space and educational model in the wake of the Matthew Shepard murder, a hate crime that occurred in Wyoming in 1998. This tragic event – along with the Columbine High School massacre of 1999 – brought the destructive and hateful effects of bullying out of the shadows and into mainstream consciousness. By the mid-2000s, bullying was seen as a dangerous social problem that causes irreparable harm to victims and society at large. It was often blamed for heinous acts such as school shootings.
Boo2Bullying’s mission is to “eradicate bullying, intolerance, and discrimination by educating schools and parents about accepting diversity and giving young people the tools to connect with and positively impact those around them,” according to the organization’s website. Its programs “build self-esteem and empower youth to overcome the adverse social [and] emotional effects of bullying, … which can last a lifetime and lead to depression, anxiety, substance abuse, and suicide,” classy.org noted. B2B’s programs include School Assemblies, Mothers Against Bullying, Community Outreach, Mentoring, and Empowerment through Art.
Bullying is defined as an unwanted and aggressive use of force, coercion, hurtful teasing, or threats, in order to abuse, aggressively dominate, or intimidate. Often, acts of bullying involve a real or perceived power imbalance. The behavior is often repeated and habitual. Bullying is rampant in board rooms, workplaces, and government offices. The manifestation of bullying in schools causes serious concern for the well-being of students and the health of society, in general. Boo2Bullying’s programs help children, teachers, parents, and schools navigate the subject with grace and empathy. They provide resources to teach students how to find their voice and speak out against intolerance, discrimination, and bullying.
B2B offers mentoring, educational resources, mental health support, and advocacy to empower young people and eradicate bullying. Tools that can diffuse situations are shared in school assemblies, which focus on bullies and their victims, according to Halkidis. He says the dynamic can often seem like “monkey see, monkey do.” B2B aims to break the cycle of bullying and give kids a way to stand up and speak out. The organization brings in young people – sometimes singers and young Hollywood actors – as peer-to-peer ambassadors who share true stories.
“Kids are going through transitions; they are finding themselves, and often bullies have been bullied at home,” Halkidis says. So, he takes his job seriously and speaks to both bullies and their victims. Girls can be bullies, as well, according to Halkidis. “They run in packs,” he says. Many of us have experienced, witnessed, or perpetrated behavior that is now overtly addressed as bullying.
A high percentage of students who are bullied are LGBTQ+ youth. Some of the statistics shared by B2B are astonishing:
- Over 90% of LGBTQ+ youth say they hear negative messages about being gay or bisexual.
- A child is bullied an average of every seven minutes on playgrounds in the U.S.
- Three million students are absent each month because they feel unsafe at school.
“We are never going to get rid of bullying,” Halkidis says. But, Boo2Bullying tries to save lives and help ameliorate the dropout rate. Halkidis stresses that the dynamics at schools have changed in the 21st century, between lockdowns, social media, the pandemic, and other cultural challenges. Unfortunately, many school districts struggle to manage bullying, and officials often don’t report it for political or financial reasons. Between privacy issues, fear of lawsuits, and the explosion of technology, schools can be hamstrung; officials might ignore bullying or be unable to deal with the problem.
Many parents report these mean-spirited and sometimes vicious acts, and not much is done to address the issue. Filming and sharing acts of bullying online can be devastating, and Halkidis encourages parents to “get to know the school and county laws in place.” He occasionally recommends that parents remove a child from their school due to bullying.
Ironically, many young people fared better during the pandemic. “Pre-COVID, in 2018 and 2019, we served 25,000 local students,” Halkidis says. “During the pandemic, while schools were closed, B2B expanded its social media outreach. Beginning [in] March 2020, we pivoted to ‘virtual’ school programs and greatly expanded our social media messaging focused on positivity and mental health.”
Today, Boo2Bullying reaches more than 40,000 young people in-person and many more online. The program is active in the Coachella Valley and Los Angeles areas. Palm Springs High School hosts a B2B event that lasts the entire day – seven periods – and divides students by grade into small groups. The organization also partners with educators in Nairobi, Kenya, and offers some programs via Zoom.
A B2B event called Kick Bullying to the Curb will occur on Oct. 11 from 4 to 8 p.m. at Palm Springs Stadium. The free event will feature a celebrity kickball game, a bouncy house, a mobile petting zoo, food trucks, and games. To find out more about this event and other B2B programs, donate, or volunteer, visit https://boo2bullying.org/.
